Jersey Shore Season 2, Episode 3 Quotes
What do you want me to do?! You f*ckin' slapped me in the face!
I’ve seen drunk people before but that was like bipolar. I’ve never seen that before, I think that’s a problem.
Do you.
If he can't hit you, I can. You're lucky you're this drunk.. wait till tomorrow.
Our boss Enzo makes me put on this black t-shirt that suffocates my girls... it was like come on, let the girls breathe.
Do I get like a Get Out of Jail Free card?
Finally, the heavens have answered & I found a barbershop in Miami.
Told ya, I needed to come to the hood to get a haircut.
You look hot…you just took my breath away. 
You tryin’ to smush right now?
Jenni’s t*its definitely defy gravity. I think Albert Einstein should come back and rewrite his laws of physics and work it around Jenni’s t*its.
I don't know how Sammi doesn't know.. I think she has an idea but she doesn't wanna believe it.. it goes back to the day that you thought the tooth fairy was alive.
Toma, toma, toma.. she was like 'ven aqui, ven aqui', pow!
Wanna f*ck? Sure.
Mike, Vinny, Pauly, MVP... and we are the most valuable players in MIA, supporting the GFF.
I might do it! I might do it! I might bust out the red joints! That’s how you know it’s gonna be a good night.
Mike and Pauly would take a stray dog if there were no girls left.
[Pauly] was like hypnotized, one of the hyenas hypnotized him.
It looks like a chicken cutlet. Yo, put that on the grill!
As soon as we saw [the fake boob], we had to get them outta here, because this is a Grenade Free Zone.
I can't see any ice creams, I can't see any customers, cuz I'm a f*ckin' Smurf.
I don’t think Mike can go a day without taking his shirt off. He looks like a frickin’ dirty old man outside with his shirt off.. at an ice cream shop.
It hurts my vagina... Ok, come down.. No no, I like it!
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