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Season One, Episode Four (s01e04)
I'm gonna f*cking get at her so bad right now, I'm gonna eat her alive, bro, seriously? You wanna play this game?
I got girls back here almost every night, there’s not a time that I don’t have girls coming back. Girls love The Situation.
They were acting kinda stupid, but we just made the best out of the situation like we always do & just ride out.
I'm hooking up with my girl, Pauly's hooking up with his girl & ahh, we're gonna have sex, so, ya know, that's the situation.
I couldn't have sex with my girl, she had her period. I go to take her pants off - she wouldn't let me, no big deal.
I’m like “chill out, Freckles McGee.”
Yes, I had sex, like hello, you're gonna have sex if you're into somebody. It's natural.
Yeah, we smushed.
You gotta stay fresh-to-death I call it - fresh outfit, fresh haircut, fresh tan, just stay fresh.
You better be hittin' the gym & if you're not hittin' the gym for like an hour or so, you know, you may have a problem. Ok, cause I'm at the gym for like an hour-and-a-half.. ya know?.. workin' on my fitness.
Mike would bang a Gatorade bottle if it had a pulse at this point. Seriously, he would.
The friggin' duck phone.
When I say I’m ready to go wild, I’m gonna go wild.
Snooki, Snickers came out of the woodwork, which is hysterical – it was the best thing I ever saw in my life.
This little shrimp thing is like bopping all around, on the circle and like doing her thing, doing backwards flips with her thong hanging out; her whole crotch is in the air.
We’re beatin’-up-the-beat, that’s what we say when we’re doing our fist pump. First, we start off by banging the ground, we’re banging it as the beat builds ‘cause that beat’s hittin’ us so we’re fightin’ back, it’s like we beat up that beat.
When I go into the club I have a game plan, I don’t wanna waste my time and take home a girl that just wants to hang out, I just wanna get to the business… so. you light it up and then you move on & at the end of the night you see who you end up with.
Let’s go, you got a quarter so get outcha car.
Basically, one of these girls was definitely more cuter than the other and it happened to be my girl & Pauly D was with “the grenade.” When you go into battle, you need to have some friends with you so that just in case a grenade gets thrown at you, one of your buddies takes it first.
I was thinkin’ heavy fire and I didn’t wear my bulletproof vest and I just don’t know if I’m gonna make it.
It wasn't, like, sexual, it's f*cking house music.
He’s a really good guy. That’s the kind of guy I need in my life. I think his name is Ron. [it was Russ]
