Poor Mike. This episode he gets alienated from the group. As Vinny points out, just about everything has been thrown at him from at least each of the other cast members. Mike, meanwhile believes everyone is out to get him because he is “strong.”
Vinny : Want to cuddle? (after Snooki got in trouble with her boyfriend)
Deena : Me and Pauly should do sex.
Pauly D : I gotta bring home a girl so Deena doesn’t come into my bed. I’m not trying to smoosh Deena.
Pauly D : Yo, I need to get a girl so Deena doesn’t f*** me tonight.
Unkown girl at club: I”m really shy … I got a d*ldo today!
Pauly D : You’re not supposed to touch a guy’s hair. | Girl: I can touch whatever the f*** I want.
Pauly D : I struck out tonight [and] I see the condition that Deena is in. I, myself, am in trouble!
Deena : Why? [can’t Pauly have sex with her] | Vinny: He’s on his period.
Vinny : Deena is h0rny. Pauly is defitnetly part of the I.F.F. right now.
Pauly D : You’re gonna have all kinds of crazy feelings. I know how girls get.
Vinny : The real reason [Pauly doesn’t want to sleep with Deena] … Pauly doesn’t like meatballs.
Deena : I’m a good f*** … I only have sex with guys that I care about.
Pauly D : I feel bad though. I should have f***** her.
Snooki : All I want to do is drink with my nipple.
Snooki : Usually, when normal people fall they get really embarrased. Me, I just get up, cover up my cuca, and I just start dancing again. Party
Pauly D : Anybody dumm enough to leave a toothbrush on a counter this dirty, deserves it. (it was Mike’s toothbrush)
Deena : Go hard or go home.
Pauly D : Dena, I would knock the dust off that p***** if we weren’t friends
Jenni “JWOWW”: [shakes head in disbelief] | Snooki: Is my vag*** out?
Sammi “Sweetheart”: You’re in mom mode like me. (watching team meatballs dancing)
Mike “The Situation”: I see you! I see you! Mangia … you. [Mike’s fighting words. mangia = eat]
Vinny : Mike only acts tough when there’s people around to hold back the fight.
Pauly D : I’m into girls. I’m not into drama, so I’m ready to go home.
Snooki : My nipp13’s out.
Deena : They were making fun of us. Maybe it was the boobs. (What?)
Deena : I wish bro. I wish bro. (Bartender threw ice cubes at Team Meatballs)
Ronnie: I feel like I’m in a snoopy episode: blah blah blah blah blah
Jenni “JWOWW”: I would rather sleep with Sammi. Go figure.
Snooki : Being kicked out of the club? Meatball problems.
Snooki : Burning your cuca in the Jacuzzi? Meatball problems.
Snooki : We’re not hookers, we’re just from Jersey.
Pauly D : Holy, leopard skin. (upon seeing Snooki)
Pauly D : Fire. Fire. Fire. Fire. With me in the house, you don’t need a fire alarm.
Mike “The Situation”: Be a woman. Do something. (talking to Deena)
Deena : I can lose weight for free. You need about 10 grand to fix your face. (to Mike)
Vinny : You know people don’t like you if every day: you get punched in the face, you have to run into a wall, champaign bottles thrown at
your head, and then spatulas.
Sammi “Sweetheart”: Me and Jenni don’t always get along cause we’re b**ches.
Vinny : Let’s give a round of applause to Ron and Sam.
Vinny : MIke brings drama into different situations … We[Vinny/Pauly] are not like that, we’re drama free.
Mike “The Situation”: That’s why they like to gang up against me. Cause I’m strong.
Pauly D : My man Vinny, loves me. We have a bromance.
Mike “The Situation”: I’m locked in the bathroom. Someone want to help me?
Ronnie: [Mike] actually used his head for once. Not like he did on the wall, but he used his head.
Pauly D : Yo, I got the freshest blowout in Firenze.
Deena : I think you have the ONLY blowout.
Mike “The Situation”: You turn around and you know who your friends are … and it’s just me.