Sharp Objects – Season 5 Episode 8

Shark!! Where’s the shark?!?! This week, the roommates decided to take a trip down to the ocean… a few times. First, they all decide to go crabbing and fishing, then Snooki and Deena wanted to break a few laws and get caught in the ocean after dark. On top of that, Mike is actually being a good roommate to Pauly and Vinny? And is Snooki go back to Vinny… again?


Pauly D : I don’t know what’s going on in this guys head right now. You keep it moving, you don’t want to fight with Rodger.

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Ronnie: At Karma, you can either walk out the door or get thrown out the door.


Snooki : I’m really excited, you know, to touch his w!#ner and make out and get it in (about Jionni).


Snooki : Honesty, you know, if Jionni’s sick or whatever, I feel bad but I wanna f#$king get it in with my boyfriend, so why the f#$k are you puking right now, let’s have sex.


Jenni “JWOWW”: Rodger: My girl had to poop. I had to wait.


Ronnie: I thought gorillas only ate bananas (to Rodger).


Jenni “JWOWW”: Rodger: Have you met my friend half-pint (about Ronnie).


Jenni “JWOWW”: Rodger: Have you met my friend half-pint (about Ronnie).


Ronnie: I feel like if my girlfriend complained as much as she did, I’d probably lose my phone too (to Rodger).


Jenni “JWOWW”: Rodger: She thought I was gonna call and kiss her ass, it ain’t gonna happen. Alright I gotta go before I get my ass kicked.


Snooki : Jionni’s wasted right now, but I feel like I never see you so lets just f$#king bang it out.


Snooki : A boyfriend’s job is to come over, have sex, and you know, make your girlfriend feel good, and at this point Jionni’s not making me feel good, he’s throwing up and passing out in my bed.


Deena : I mean do you really need talent to fish though? You just throw the thing in the thing.


Deena : Can you imagine though, eight guido’s trying to fish.


Vinny : I already got crabs last night out at Karma.


Jenni “JWOWW”: Got an extra bucket to throw up in (to crab guy).


Pauly D : Yo I’m gonna catch me Sunday dinner.


Jenni “JWOWW”: I caught a guido!


Pauly D : Yo, why can’t I just put Snooki on this hook, catch me a big fish?


Pauly D : Crabs are here!


Jenni “JWOWW”: I don’t even want to say it. Snooki: What? Jenni: I caught crabs.


Mike “The Situation”: Yo this ain’t happening. Guidos ain’t made to fish. I can fish for girls but not f#@king for fish.


Vinny : Mike’s just like, spread-eagle right now in one of his feminine poses.


Deena : I feel like this is like my relationships, not one person wants to grab my bait.


Ronnie: So I let the air out of the boat, arms are flying in the air, there’s meatball sauce everywhere.


Snooki : This boat is sinking and I’ve seen titanic and this is not going to end well.


Sammi “Sweetheart”: Deena is literally trying to get out of three feet of water because there’s sharks in it.


Pauly D : Yo, Snooki’s all through these waters.


Pauly D : You know how you catch a Snooki, pickles!


Mike “The Situation”: He’s working hard in there, his insides are coming out.


Pauly D : She doesn’t talk, but yet stalks.


Pauly D : She’ll work my entire shift at the t-shirt shop just staring at me.


Pauly D : And I’m freaked out because she stares right at me with this like that I can feel burning a hole in my head and it’s messing with my blowout.


Vinny : Oh it stands for Down to Fish (when asked what DTF stands for)


Snooki : I’ll shoot you with a pistol in your f#$king eyeball.


Snooki : Yeah buddy, I know how to work my balls.


Snooki : Even though I lost the bet and I have to wear the bunny suit to Karma, it’s not really a big deal because Lola is like my best friend.


Vinny : I might want to reconsider having sex with you right now. You should just always leave the mask on (to Snooki).


Vinny : Stripper, prostitute, bunny, Lola, is pretty hot tonight, I think.


Deena : Lola is definitely the most popular girl at Karma tonight, I’m a little jealous, I’m gonna have to bring her home tonight for myself.


Mike “The Situation”: I actually am like the hunter and gatherer at the house, when it comes to ladies.


Snooki : I kinda wanna, you know, break a law or two tonight.


Deena : So the only difference between the meatballs and Baywatch right now is the red bathing suits, and David Hasselhoff.


Snooki : Holy buttsack I’m tired.


Snooki : This morning I feel like freaking a$$, like I’m still drunk, but it’s like, you know the drunk where you wanna throw up and you feel disgusting, I’d rather just drink it off.


Snooki : Ronnie looks like s$!t right now and I’m like bro, you’re hung over, we need to go to the bar and fix that.


Ronnie: I just see Snooki’s head floating.


Ronnie: To average people, that’s a mini-bike, to Nicole, that’s like a normal motorcycle.


Pauly D : I got the night shift tonight, it’s me, Situation, and Jenni, so I expect to be doing most of the work.


Jenni “JWOWW”: Pauly, your girl is creeping me out right now. Pauly D: Me too.


Pauly D : This girl is going to kill me, she’s gonna kidnap me, put me in her basement, have me DJ for her, and I’m gonna be MIA, you guys are gonna be looking for me.


Jenni “JWOWW”: Pauly’s stalker officially scares me.


Jenni “JWOWW”: I think the blanket is wrapped around something heavy, it’s either Pauly’s hair, or it’s a chainsaw (about Vanessa).


Pauly D : It’s not Pauly D anymore, it’s gonna be DJ Pauly Dead!


Vinny : If Nicole is breathing and Nicole is conscious, she’s probably talking about sex.


Vinny : I’m on the boardwalk with Nicole wasted right now, and, this is kinda questionable what I’m doing.